What makes for a healthy romantic relationship differs from couple to couple. An engaging, secure love relationship can be an ongoing source of support and happiness. Good relationships strengthen all aspects of life: your health, your mind, and your work. However, if the relationship isn’t supportive, it can be a tremendous drain. Relationships get better or worse depending on how much or how little we understand and invest in them. Below are some habits that will help create and maintain a happy and healthy twosome.
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Communication
Communication is key. It is one of the fundamental qualities in a healthy relationship. However, not everyone knows how to communicate properly. Happy and healthy couples seem to have the communication side of the relationship working as a well-oiled machine. They vocalize their love for one another, saying “I love you” often and offering compliments. They also discuss the bad instead of sweeping issues under the rug. In order to move forward and grow, you two need to be able to truly talk about your feelings. No matter how awkward or uncomfortable it feels, it will make for a long-lasting and fulfilling relationship and eventually become a natural part of your relationship.
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Respect
R.E.S.P.E.C.T, yes, the song that Aretha Franklin sang. It’s got to be important if there’s a whole song written about it. Respecting your partner and relationship comes in many different forms. Maintaining a joyful relationship means respecting your partner’s time, heart, character, and trust. There are many things people do in relationships that can break down respect, like name-calling, talking negatively about your partner to friends or family, and/or threatening to leave the relationship. These are relationship no-no’s. If you truly love you partner, respect should come naturally.
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Quality not Quantity
It’s all about quality over quantity. It doesn’t matter how much time you spend together and work on your relationship. What counts is the quality of this time. As a simple example, there is a huge difference between having dinner together at the table and talking about your day, versus having dinner on the couch while watching your favourite TV series. It’s perfectly natural to zone out together but it’s crucial to ensure you are engaging in quality time together and working on maintaining a deep connection.
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Time Apart
Spending time together as a couple and working on your relationship is important. But, spending time apart is just as important. It’s vital to do things on your own and maintain a sense of independence. When you spend too much time together, it can create a sense of co-dependency. Maintaining healthy boundaries and some autonomy will make for a long-lasting partnership. It’s natural to spend time a part so don’t feel guilty if you with your partner every waking moment.
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Language of Love
Gary Chapman, author of “The Five Love Languages”, came up with the notion that men and women have five love languages. People have unique and individual ways of feeling loved. These could include words of affirmation, receiving gifts, quality time, acts of service, and physical touch. It’s important to explore and know which love language speaks to you along with your partner to know what works best for your relationship. Tell each other what makes you feel loved and wanted helps both of you stay connected. Build on that language to create desire and intimacy.
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Appreciation
Often, we forget to let other people in our lives know that we appreciate them. We think it, but we don’t remember to show it. This occurs in our romantic relationships as well. Show your special someone that you love him or her. This could be done with words, cards, flowers, acts of kindness, or more. Remember, a flower a day keeps the fights at bay. Okay, maybe not every day, but you get the point.
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Positive vs. Negative
At times, we are caught up in the negative aspects in life. We hate our jobs, are annoyed with friends and our partner is getting on our last nerve.
It’s vital that we focus on our partner’s positive qualities in contrast to the negative. No one is perfect, and that includes our significant other. So instead of focusing on the bad, make a conscious effort to focus on the good.
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Choose Your Battles Wisely
There are arguments to be had in every relationship. It’s crucial to bring issues to the forefront, and work through the hard times together. However, I don’t think arguing over your significant other using your favourite coffee cup should be one of those. Choose your battles wisely, because people in happy and healthy relationships do.
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Sex
Let’s talk about sex, baby. Let’s also talk about how important it is in cultivating a flourishing relationship. Sex is simple. The more you have it, the more you want it. The other side of that is true as well. The less you have it, the less you want it — and, unfortunately, the less you’ll feel connected to your partner. Keep your sex life alive and interesting. “Spicing it up” is not just meant for the kitchen.
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The Grass isn’t always greener on the other side
Even if the grass is greener, it might not be the kind of grass you would like. We often compare our lives to those of others — what jobs people have, their homes, and their clothes. And with the help of social media, we tend to compare our relationships as well. But the happiest of couples don’t look to see what the grass looks like on the other side. They are happy with the view out their own front door.
And last, but not least….
Do chores together like washing the dishes and walking the dog.
Never have secrets and don’t go to bed angry.
During the day, send your partner a sexy photo to get them thinking of you during the day.
Always be affectionate…and share the same goals in life.
Let your partner know when you’re thinking of them.
Say ‘I love you’ every chance you get.
Have a lot of amazing sex.
Keep each other laughing.
Never stay mad at each other.
Take interest in each other’s hobbies.
Don’t be afraid to be silly together.
Don’t listen to the opinions of other people (who aren’t in the relationship.
The three Cs: compromise, communication, and cuddling! If something seems to be wrong, it’s usually because one of these things is missing.
Date nights are key. The dates don’t have to be expensive. Just take a walk together or make dinner at home.
