What is frigidity?
This a term used to refer to women who have a chronically low sex drive. The word frigid is also often used incorrectly to describe a woman who may be emotionally cold, or does not readily respond to her partner’s sexual advances.
The lack of sexual desire may reside deep in the subconscious, and may be linked to problems that can be successfully treated. In some cases a woman may avoid or refuse sexual activity, because they are unable to reach a climax, and find little or no pleasure in the sex act.
However, whether the basic cause is physical or emotional, frigidity can lead to problems in even the most secure relationships.
While men tend to become aroused very quickly, most women seldom do. Unfortunately, a man who may be disappointed at the slowness, or lack of his partner’s arousal, may call her frigid – only adding fuel to what could be an already fierce fire.
Analysing frigidity
Most therapists and sex counsellors believe that there is no such condition as frigidity, but agree that it is a term often used by men in a derogatory way to describe women who are not sexually responsive to their advances.
Intimacy involves a range of emotions from romance, feelings of closeness and security, to feelings of desire and sensuality. Ideally the situation should feel right for both partners to enjoy the moment, but in reality this rarely happens.
Some women have the erroneous idea that sex is something women give to men, and commitment is something men give to women. This is often the root of all libido problems in both sexes. It is almost as if both partners are under some sort of obligation for sex to take place.
Therapists have reported that some women have summed up their lack of desire by shifting the blame to their partners, stating that most times when they only want affection, their partners always want sex. This belief can cause women to move into an area of physical coldness and a complete withdrawal from showing affection.
However this is not always true for everyone, but perhaps helps to show that sexuality does not exist in isolation. There are a myriad of other factors involved for a mutual enjoyment of a loving relationship.
Some emotional and physical causes for frigidity
- Past traumatic experiences such as rape, sexual assault or incest.
- Situational factors such as an intoxicated partner, or someone in the next room when you have visitors, or when you may be visiting others.
- A bad relationship where a woman is expected to be ready for sex after verbal or physical abuse.
- Effects of some medications, as well as alcohol or drug abuse.
- An underlying medical or gynaecological problem.
- Hormonal imbalances.
- A lack of adequate foreplay.
- High levels of stress, exhaustion and chronic fatigue.
- A poor body image, combined with low self-esteem and a lack of confidence.
None of these problems are insurmountable, and a possible lack of communication with your partner is often a major cause of the hassles. A frank open discussion with your partner will always help, as will counselling, to keep your relationship from disintegrating.
Treatment options
If a chronic lack of sexual desire has become a serious problem and is causing harm to your relationship, there are many treatments available for you to consider.
If you suspect that the cause of the low libido may be physical, visit your doctor to establish if there are any medical or hormonal problems, which might need treatment to restore your health.
To deal with emotional or psychological issues such stress and anxiety, the doctor may suggest seeing an experienced counsellor, either as an individual or as a couple. Some women, whose instinctive responses to sexuality may have been repressed or inhibited because of religious or cultural issues, will benefit greatly from professional help.
Changing poor lifestyle and dietary habits, such as cutting down on alcohol and smoking, and embracing a healthy eating plan, can also play a part in dealing with low libido.
We can help
Many women who have labelled as frigid, are actually warm and caring, with only some sexual dysfunction, which can be treated. If frigidity was really part of your make up, you would be unable to get pleasure from any of your sensual activities, such as eating and drinking, delighting in the sunset, or being moved by music.
Herbal Remedies International have natural herbal products, with no side effects, which have been specially formulated for women. These excellent, scientifically-based products, will enhance your libido, and work to correct sexual dysfunctional problems.
The products are absolutely safe, and a doctor’s script is not needed.
Visit us at www.herbalremedies.co.za to see our extensive range and find out how we can help you.
